insert celebrity name here: i was bullied at school
me playing any new game: i don't need your shitty tutorials
me five seconds later: what the fuck am i doing
teacher: NO DON'T PACK UP WE STILL HAVE .00000007 SECONDS OF CLASS LEFT!
Live the life you would be envious of if you saw someone else living it. This is...– Olivia Munn (via endlesslyerica)
louweetomlinson: I don’t want to get over One Direction there I said it
A man is in his house, it’s late at night and there’s a knock at the door… and...– As told by David Sedaris on the Daily Show, 11/4/10 (via holywine)
How many men does it take to wallpaper a...
deliciafelicia: fancybidet: strangeasanjles: moon-cunt: mermaid-vision: notyrqueer: Just one. But you have to slice him very, very thin omg omg omg Buahahahahahahahahahahahahaaaaaa MISANDRY. I snorted this is the best, grossest feminist joke ever and I love it.
thealbinoweave: do you ever have so much to do that you just decide not to do any of it
senpai-has-noticed-you: sometimes i think i’m arrogant but then i remember that julius caesar was kidnapped by sicilian pirates and when they demanded a ransom of 620 kgs of silver he got mad because he thought he was worth more than that and made them raise it to 1550 kg
unfollower: timoodles: there is a town called sandwich in massachusetts there are literally police cars labelled sandwich police i live in Cumming don’t talk to me
the-vashta-nerada: when my older sister was in high school they had a really strict policy against note passing and if they caught a note they’d read it in front of class so my sister and her friends all learned tolkien elvish so if a teacher ever found their notes they wouldn’t be able to read it
insignificantsilence: Apparently if someone dies in the exam hall we all get our predicted grades. Who’s willing to take one for the team guys.